Monday, October 17, 2011

My way of thinking/ friendship

Is there such a thing as having TOO many friends? This is a question I have been asking myself ever since I took the plunge and put myself on facebook. My original plan was to find a few old chums (30 at most) and keep in touch the easy way. You know, without too much personal contact. Yeh. And how's that working out Austin? 312 friends and growing, that's how.

It is wonderful that I have been blessed to know so many people in my life. Those are just the friends who are on Facebook. Then there are the ones who aren't. My emails are something I both love and dread at the same time. There are days when it looks like a full time job. Trying to answer everyone individually is impossible, so I end up sending out group emails. Then I feel guilty for being so impersonal. Someone is bound to feel a bit ignored and then I find myself dealing with someone's hurt feelings. What's a guy supposed to do?

I have come up with a solution that works for me. I have categorized my friends into groups. I shuffled up the group lists and left them in that order. No one list takes precedence over another. There are 5 separate lists and each week I pick 5 names from each list. I try to pick those people I haven't contacted in awhile. The friends I talk to all the time don't count. I couldn't stop them if I tried. The 25 people from the lists get my full attention, usually at 2a.m. after Jon and the pups are sound asleep.

I love people so much. I never want to slight anyone. But reality is reality. Love is truly a commitment of epic proportion. You do the best you can and trust that everyone will understand.

To answer my own question. No you can't have too many friends. Just as you can't love too many people. You just have to organize a little.

                                           Peace and Love,




  1. Ha! ain't that the truth! you can never have too many friends, but organization is key!

    I love that you are reaching out to folks on your lists -- esp. the folks you don't regularly communicate with -- I think I need to do that too.

    Atti, Wibur, Bella and I are honor & happy to be part of your friendship circle :)

    Heidi & Atticus
    "commentary to give you paws..."

    ps: Love the photo!! are you playing with flickr??

  2. The photo was sent to me by a friend. He raises horses in New Mexico.
    I am the one who's honored to have you guys on my team. Your love and support puts you at the top of any list but you don't have to be on a list. We will be in touch regularly no matter what.
    Loving the book, by the way. Having to read it a little at a time. Almost done.

  3. Bill, You are so kind! It's great you are getting in touch with so many people you've known throughout your life. I love how committed you are to your friends and how you don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. You're a good man.

    caregiving. family. advocacy.

  4. Thank you Trish. What a compliment, coming from one of the kindest people I know. My friends are my family and giving them everything I've got is important to me. I'm trying hard to keep up with everyone. Thank God for fb.

  5. I just love the idea of putting an organizational scheme onto your burgeoning friends' list! You are a bit more of a people person than I, and I admire your devotion to sustaining your friendships. I, too, am grateful to facebook for putting me in contact with old friends and new. Will have to consider some organizing.

    Judy Stone-Goldman
    The Reflective Writer
    Personal-Professional Balance Through Writing

  6. I HAVE to be organized Judy! My life would be chaos if I didn't set priorities and stick to them. Poor Jon. He is forced to be organized with me. That is not really his nature but I seem to set the time schedule and he does his best to keep up. He laughs about my lists, schedules, notes, and alarms. A dash of OCD maybe. Or just anal retentive I guess. Ha Ha!

  7. This comment has been removed by the author.

  8. Hi Austin,

    without friends we'd be so lonely and miserable! I love staying in touch with all my buddies worldwide and I am so happy to have facebook because I don't know if I will see some of them ever again.
    And then are the new friends that I will hope to meet in person one day :-)

    Franziska San Pedro
    The Abstract Impressionist Artress

  9. I knew this post would resonate for my cd friends. Seems we are all so busy but we all can organize enough to write on our blogs and still keep up with friends and family. I think we are not only a group of determined writers. We are a group of extraordinary people.

    Thanks June and Franziska. I am proud you are both my friends.

  10. Isn't networking online wonderful? I call it community building and I actually posted an article on this topic a few days ago. It's amazing the wonderful group of supportive bloggers who are helping me grow my business through their support and advice. None of us can do this alone and it's wonderful to have met so many bloggers with areas of expertise that compliment mine. Nice post Bill!